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Q: Do you know any way to get the stank out of tennis shoes? Fabreeze sure as hell doesn't work!

A: I'm not surprised that didn't work; I've found most scented laundry products, no matter what their claim may be, do little more than add another layer of offensive "stank" to the original funk, making both unpleasant. I'm tempted to say try washing them, or try removing the sole and washing or replacing that, or maybe pour a gob of baking soda in there and let it sit for a few days and repeat a few times? Then again, it should be inquired as to whether said stank was caused by not wearing socks? My dad gave me some special charcoal-based socks that actually work in de-stankifying my feet; perhaps you or your dad could track those down? I think it's also kinda sad that people's feet stink at all and am convinced that if you covered your hands in cotton and non-ventilated leather and went around for hours like that everyday that they would smell every bit as bad as what we normally equate feet with. Or maybe that's just what the folks at Fabreeze WANT me to think. What a lame name.

Q: Where do you get your ideas and time to make them happen?

A: Hmmm, good questions...the first I can't really answer because they just happen, and the second...all I can say is not having a TV can make a world of difference in finding time for various projects. Now I ask you the same question!

Q: Do you think DJs are wannabe musicians?

A: I think a good DJ has a pallette more varied in texture and timbre than any other instrumentalist in the history of this planet. I have a lot of respect for what could be considered the newest instruments (turntables/laptops) and those who dedicate themselves to making new sounds through practice, trial & error and sheer curiosity in sonic combinations. Your question seems to make your position pretty clear, but doesn't leave a lot of room for some of the innovations these folks are capable of! Check out guys like DJ Spooky, DJ Radar, DJ Ultraviolet, Mix Master Mike, Ztrip, or the film "Scratch" and see if you find any agreement!

Q: If I'm hydrated and drink a cup of coffee on an empty stomach, do you think I'd pee exactly a cup of pee?

A: Metaphysical questions like these titillate me! Well, I'm no Mister Science, but I think you'd probably get at least close to a cup of pee. I asked my friend Shoe and he thinks you'd be wise to spend some time at your local library where you can research fascinating anatomical queries such as these with greater ease and joy.

Q: So just how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop?

A: You're better off asking the owl...but then again, he always was a dirty bird.

Q: Buckethead or Yngwie Malmsteen?

A: If you're asking me who I think the better musician is, I'd have to give it up for my man Buckethead. He's got chops up the wazoo and isn't afraid to tackle a variety of genres, plus he's a freak on wheels and funny. Yngwie, on the other hand, well, um, have you seen/heard his concerto for electric guitar and orchestra?

Q: Do people really ask you questions or do you just make this crap up?

A: The real question is, did I make up your question in the form of a fake question as an example of how easy it would be to fabricate a fake question? If so, then this answer doesn't really exist, and it's kinda crappy anyway.

Q: you advertise "obligation-free advice and potential wisdom from one more wanderer on the path."
which path is that of which you speak? and why are you wandering?

A: Good question! I reckon the path is that which unfolds in front of you, including the horse poop, dead ends, poorly-marked signs, forks, questionable people, treacherous precipices and breath-taking (and giving) views. I'm wandering because there's so much to see and smell in every direction. If I was plowing ahead because some external force obliged me to, I'd miss all the details to take in. Ask again next year and you'll probably get a totally different answer!

Q: Can you actually prove that Bush and company are as evil as you stated in a recent blog entry?

A: At the risk of sounding too new-agey, I can only state what all the dimensions of my being are telling me, and its pretty rare conventional politics enter into that. I also feel that conservatives who espose the bias of a "liberal media" only perpetuate themselves as clueless. Now that everyone and their dog has a blog, we're approximating something akin to true freedom of expression and that's a wonderful thing. My question to you might be: can you prove they aren't in your blog?!

Q: What do you recommend listening to these days?

A: If you're talking about recorded music, I can only say that with a combination of chance, curiosity and intention, you're bound to come across music that'll rock your boat. I think the best stuff is largely underground, or with smaller avenues of distribution than, say, Pink or Weezer. If you're talking about live music, go see (isn't it funny nobody talks about *listening* to bands as a group activity?) as many groups and soloists in as many styles as possible. Soak up purely acoustic sounds in a good hall with as much verve as some local hardcore band or improvising freakazoids. If you're talking about the pure act of listening, then start with your nervous system and move your attention outward from there. Nature is the ultimate listening experience, really.

I'm blessed in that I have access to thousands of CDs via the store I work at in Santa Fe, and my iTunes library has exploded as a result. Recent cochlear ticklings include: Gorillaz, Demon Days; Squarepusher, Music is Rotted One Note; Merzbird; Albert Ayler, Spirits Rejoice; Mastodon, Leviathan; and 2 live CDs I participated in--Uninvited Guests and Al Faaet's Prophecy Quartet. I've also been making and receiving lots of mix CDs for friends all over the country, which contain lots of different styles and traditions.

Mix CDs are great but don't always have the same quality of recorded presence of the person who compiled them that tapes did. Back in the cassette days, you'd have to sit there and listen to everything unfold in real time as it was being committed to tape. Now you just grab a few tunes, arrange them in a random (or not) order and make sure it'll all fit onto one CD and click 'burn.'. I don't know (or especially care, really) if those who have made me CD mixes sat down and listened to them from beginning to end the same way I do upon their receipt. Whatever. I'm babbling. What was question? Oh yeah, sonic recommendations...listen to your heart and not to those who impart advice. Fifty bucks, please.

Q: i pruned a tree for the first time in my life today and i can't get over how awful it made me feel. what right do i have to try to 'improve' the way anything grows naturally? My boss had me do it so it would look more like other trees in the neighborhood. but in truth i hacked it up pretty good. if someone did that to me so that i looked more like the other people in my neighborhood, it would have to be a neighborhood full of carbomb victems in order for me to fit in. and what's worse one of the branches i cut fell and hit this little dog that some portugese lady was walking and now she is mad at me and swearing but i don't understand any of the words she uses. .and what's worse is i learned the other day that if i buy heinz ketchup i am not necessarily suppporting kerry's candidacy because theresa legally has to keep her pockets to her self and not spend it all on her husband's race with satan. it's getting harder to find the glass bottles that don't make bathroom sounds all over your burger at the table, too.

A: Goodness gracious, you do have a lot on your metaphysical plate, don't you? Well, deciphering the amount of actual "advice" to impart yields the following from my not-quite-caffeinated-enough brain: Trees and plants need an occasional pruning, although the esthetics of conformity and propriety should be at the bottom of the list of reasons why. Pruning is a good way to help a plant concentrate its energy in more focused areas, and I'm pretty sure there's a metaphor in there somewhere. Next time provide helmets to your neighbors or set up some attractive orange cones to warn the wandering of your mission. And Heinz ketchup? I thought you'd be fully converted to the Seeds of Change cult by now. If you must go with Heinz, stock up with the pocket-size McDonald's packets next time you're there and eliminate that unpardonable bathroom sonority (and perhaps pad your nether regions) forever.

Q: How hard should one try to not try? I ask because I hardly ever try to not try, but lots of people say I should ALWAYS not try, and that makes me want to try harder, but then I forget.

A: Ah yes, the old 'trying dilemma' strikes again. Choose one of the following three options and all your solutions will manifest: (1) Try Jesus (2) Try Smoking (3) Read the Tao Te Ching, either number 21 or 54. It's good to forget what people tell you what to do, especially if the "should" energy is engaged. Listen to your body, and if the language barrier is bumming you out, find a good translator/bodyworker to give you some new perspectives to consider...or forget!

Q: What's the best way to attract a suitable mate? and what is your opinion re: the delicate balance of being indifferent enough to be appealing and proactive enough to sucessfully pursue?

A: Two-part love questions make me all gooey inside. Well, my take on the first part is to simpy be yourself and be present in all aspects of your life. I feel one's intellect can sometimes fool you into thinking you need a partner while your heart may simply want some time and space to BE. Solitude needlessly frightens an awful lot of people, yet offers many avenues of growth and richness. If, however, you've fully explored the joys and tribulations of being single, and find you're feeling incomplete or lonely, perhaps it IS time to put yourself out there. The parameters of the second part of the question, however, may or may not be your strongest allies. So back to the first part: be yourself, be present, be aware and be involved. Do a ritual, ask the universe for guidance. Somewhere in your orbit, or an orbit you may step into soon, will be the lucky someone with whom you may share some time and energy. Keep your eyes (and naughty parts) open for that special sparkle someone will emanate. Lucky numbers: 6, 42, 77, 1, 84, 26.

Q: Are the policemen as fat in New Mexico as they are here in Boston? Gee you shoulda seen all the cops here during the convention!

A:Your breath smells like summer onions. Ya know, I hardly saw a cop at all while I was first here, and those I did were only visible in their cars. Maybe it's the lack of Dunkin' Donuts franchises in the Southwest, or maybe it's the live-and-let-live philosophy that seems to permeate the air. I'm glad I didn't see the gestapo-like security of the DNC, and even more glad one of them didn't lock me up for stealing their cane or going through their old files. I hear they're even fatter out in Petersham. Must be something in the muffins...

Q: What is your tattoo? What does it mean? When did you get it? I got mine in Sept. 2003. Marking the Turning 30 and other things.

A:Well, since I'm not sure which tatt you mean, but suspecting you're talking about my inner forearms, there's one on each. Basically they're a yin-yang thing I designed using the letters X and Y in morse code. They remind me I'll always be faced with duality in this lifetime and they also signify my chromosome makeup and the two hemispheres of my brain. I got them in 2001, I think. I also have a circle on my sternum and an arrow on my solar plexus. Those signify my allegiance to Wal-mart and the Republican/Christian platform. Or maybe the opposite, or maybe something about my chakras--I can't recall. Ink is great for mapping out your journey on the only thing that's truly yours in this world. Before I got my first one I followed some advice I'll impart to others: if you're thinking of gettting a tattoo, wait a year and see if you still want it and what it will mean to you. I do like abstract work for the purpose of decoration, but impulse tattoos (of cartoon characters and the like) seem to usually be regretted later in life. We're glad you made it into your third decade and are still filling the world with good images and energy!

Q: What is your opinion on globalization and the whole 'New Economy' during these troubled times?

A:I think the more we can do to create community around us and live authentic lives, the better off we'll all be. This applies to economics, tolerance and thinking outside of the box, which is particularly hard for us in the states. Avoiding television is a great first step. The axiom "Think Globally, Act Locally" really can't be beat. "Economy" has to do with jobs and stuff, right?

Q: When starting a new composition for guitar, do you prefer the mixolydian to the aeolian mode? Do you plan to use harmonics in each and every piece? And why? Or why not?

A:Hmmm, I can't say I've ever preconceived a mode or its textures *before* starting a composition. That stuff comes later when harmonic considerations come into play. That isn't to say a particular flavor can't influence things. I suppose if I was still into serial music I might preconceive something, but I'd extend those parameters to include more than modes: tempo, pitch, duration, dynamics, etc. That's good for the brain sorta music, but not always resonant for the gut...

Q: Where do all the ducks go in the wintertime?

A: Great question, and thank you for asking it. Ducks and their goosey brethren go to a magical place called Sun City, Arizona. A place where manicured lawns contrast the arrid landscape frightfully. A place where the old and the older get along beautifully and wave to one another as they pass in their street-tough golf carts. The ducks stay mostly in the orange trees while the geese prefer the grass. When hints of Spring start to surface they get out their I Ching coins and collectively decide where to go next. Last I knew there landed somewhere in Ohio. Check out www.duckjourney.org for more details.